At the close of the year I think about the negative habits that I would like to shed and the better habits that I would like to form. I have a “blank book” of 365 pages set before me and I want to write the best story possible. But I have been here before. What about the old habits that I tried to shed last year without much success?
I found a new insight from a book that reversed my thinking about how to bring lasting change to some of those stubborn areas.1 The author talks about three layers in changing a habit: the outcome—what you wish to obtain, the process—the plan to achieve it, and identity—the core of your belief. Instead of beginning with our wish (the outcome), he gives the suggestion that we can start with our identity, who we are or want to become. He proceeds with the simple illustration of someone who refuses a cigarette by saying, “No thanks, I am trying to quit,” in comparison to stating, “No thanks, I am not a smoker.” The second statement is more powerful, allowing the person to live their new identity.
As Christians, there are many aspects to our identity: : we are His temple (1 Corinthians 3:16), citizens of His kingdom (Colossians 1:13), His bride (Romans 7:4 KJV), children of light and of the day (1 Thessalonians 5:5), and much more. By His grace, we can learn to “put on Christ” (Romans 13:14) and walk in “newness of life” (Romans 6:4).
For example, let’s say that this year I want to be a nicer person with my co-workers. Long ago I decided that I should be a better listener, less judgmental, less harsh in my reactions—but oh, it’s so hard! Now I remember that I am an ambassador for Christ (2 Corinthians 5:20) and I represent Him to everyone I work with. Ambassadors go to diplomatic academies where they learn how to represent their countries. I can go to the Bible to find out how to best represent God’s kingdom. As I represent Him, I will naturally begin to see my co-workers through His eyes, I will respect them and want to listen without critical judgment. I will be gentler in my answers. New habits will form, and as I grow closer to my workmates, I will also grow in the knowledge of the Lord. This is a “win-win” situation and a great challenge for the new year!